All in MAY 2018 (V.I I.II)
At age seven, Sana ceremoniously cut a chunk out of her eyebrow. Gripping on to a pair of pink craft scissors, she balanced deftly on her tiptoes in the hopes of finding her reflection in the hallway mirror. The wayward hairs reminded her of spider’s legs that needed to be impaled, so she surreptitiously raised the scissors towards her brow.
When my dad got home, I did not tell him about the dressing up, so he did not kill my mother. We hid the signs real good. Put the shoes back just the same, not an inch out of place.
Uncle Tait would alternate between the two when cooking up schemes like this, though this was the first time he included me. We’d wear our church clothes on a Tuesday, he said. That way, they’d think that’s how we always dressed.
Everything was new to us and so we didn’t notice the things that would separate us eventually, like who dressed well and who always looked sloppy no matter how hard they tried not to. We didn’t see who was tall and who was pretty and who was not. We were too busy trying to remember all the instructions and where we were supposed to sit and when we were supposed to stand.
The earliest part of the morning – and it’s not even called morning yet, it’s still a part of the night – enters the streets of a sleepy Paris. Restaurants in Picpus haven’t put tables outside. I like this part of the city, the streets are wider, you can feel the scale of Paris outside the narrow streets of downtown and escape conventional tourist routes near the Eiffel Tower.
When she died my Aunt Lydia told my dad that she would hold on to her jewelry until I was old enough to have it. My dad said that no, he would hold on to it. My aunt seemed surprised but said yes of course. That night he put the little birdcage around my neck.
The fairies under my desk didn’t come out right away. While I could hear them skittering in the distance and I caught glimpses of their profiles sitting in the corners of my eyes, I never could get a good look at them. They didn’t trust people much, which is understandable given everything that’s happened.
She’s married. The thought intruded into my mind sometimes when I’d be looking at her face. Her tan golden face. Little freckles on her nose. I had no idea why.